In The Still of The Night

As I feed Ayla in the still of the night, rocking in my Mother's glider - I am blindsided. Very much like a big wave in the ocean that sweeps you off your feet without warning.

I soak it all in, relishing in the moment as I reflect on the onslaught of emotions stirred up in this chair. I gaze on this sweet little angel in my arms and praise God for breathing life into her, through the miracle of science, ultimately ordained by THE CREATOR.

I cry.

I cry...because the gratitude in my heart is overflowing.

I cry...because the wonder of this moment overwhelms me.

I cry...because I am sitting in my Mother's chair and I miss her terribly.

I cry...because she and Daddy are not here to see, to hold and to love Ayla.

I cry...because Ayla will never know her Great-Grammie and Grandad.

I cry...because I know HE has allowed them to see Ayla from heaven. (but selfishly I wanted to see them see)

I cry...because I can just imagine how excited they are to know that Sarah took their chair and transformed it into this precious heirloom to be handed down to Ayla someday.

I cry...because my Almighty God has granted Sarah's desire to have a child of her own.

I cry...for the struggles Sarah went through to get here.

I cry...because of the way God used her struggles to make her walk with the Lord much sweeter and stronger.

I cry...because Sarah has grown into such a precious young woman and a wonderful little mother.

I cry...because I am so proud of her.

I cry...because my heart is overflowing with gratitude for all four of my precious grandchildren - Natalie, Parker, Sawyer, and Ayla.

I cry...because I am reminded of all of you sweet women out there still waiting for God's answer to your dreams. I say a prayer for you.

I cry...because that's what women do - in the still of the night.