Thursday, January 20, 2011

The $10,000.00 Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a middle-aged queen bought a front load high efficiency washing machine, complete with a pedestal/storage drawer to rest it on. Its beauty was a wonder to behold.

The Queen loved being able to put clothes in and take clothes out without even bending over! Plus the machine is known all across the land for being energy and water efficient! Wow! What a deal! ...especially 50 years later, when the Queen becomes old and decrepit.

But...there was trouble in the utility "roomdom" from the very first day it was placed in the house. The washing machine was, and still is possessed. The Queen and her household have witnessed many episodes of this evil machine's power. But the two most disturbing, diabolical antics to witness have been its ability to freely roam about from one location to another...that and the horrible, terrifying noises it makes - both of which occur during the - *long dramatic pause* - SPIN CYCLE!
The first time this evil one made its presence known, the noise level and the shaking of the entire house caused the Queen and her household to dive and take cover...fearing they were under attack from a misguided missile! When the coast was clear, a careful assessment of this horrendous attack was found! The machine was no longer where it was positioned upon arrival. It had WALKED its way across the room and set itself right down on the other side. Oh, yes it did!
The King threatened to kill the machine, but the Queen, being of a gentle and forgiving nature, begged the King to let it live. And so he did.
It has been 4 years now and the evil one continues to haunt the Queen and her household...although the King still wants desperately to destroy it - and has vowed to do so someday when the Queen is away.
There are consequences of allowing the evil one to remain. They include:
~ Gouges in the wood floor from the many walk-abouts of the evil one. ~ Footprints of the evil one's feet as it has roamed about.
~ Self-inflicted wounds, as the evil one has scraped its side against the counter top from its wanderings. The Queen has no sympathy for its pain.

But fairy tales are supposed to have happy endings, so the Queen tried very hard to find a silver lining to this evil one's deeds. One day as the Queen was wrestling with the evil one, leaning all her weight into the machine to keep it from walking all across the floor, she had a vision.

Suddenly the Queen began to sing. She quickly realized what an incredible talent the machine had given her. The Queen was singing just like Snow White! It was a beautiful gift - one which the Queen decided to share...with you!

The quality of this self-taped phone video is very poor, but you will get just a glimpse of the incredible talent bestowed upon the Queen. And, thankfully because the quality is so poor, you cannot see the Queen's jowls flapping about from the force of the evil one's strength.

video

In the vision given to the Queen, was a brilliant plan - she was told to send a better quality video into America's Funniest Home Videos. There she will be able to possibly win $10,000.00 and can then buy a new machine...one that's not possessed! Or...if she so chooses, she can fix those flapping jowls, keep the evil one, and continue to amaze people with her incredible gift of singing like Snow white.

*And, just so you know...if you try to steal the Queen's idea, she will have her Guards track you down, and you WILL regret ever messing with her!

4 comments:

  1. I am laughing so hard!!! My girls have recently discovered snow white, and we watch it every.single.day. They try to sing like her and it is hilarious.

    You are so funny!

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  2. what a funny story! yet i am sympathetic at the damage that was done. good luck!

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  3. Hey, girlfriend.....hope the laundry room didn't get the best of you! Just want you to know....been missin' you 'round these parts! Just so's ya know!

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  4. This fairytale was so funny if you are not a part of the tale. You have a way with words but now I am ready for an update!!! Hope everything is going good for you and your family....bring us up to date!!!

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